FeD Ex

The pink delivery van pulled up to the curb, the large FeD Ex logon in stark black on its side.

"He's here."

"Aw, Dad, do I have to?"

"Mina we've been through this. Driving would take days and flying is too expensive."

"But, Dad-"

"No, Mina."

"Mom?"

"Honey, we all agreed."

The doorbell rang.

"Hi. I'm Jeff. If you would just read and sign the form we can be on our way."

He handed the tablet to Mina who signed it with barely a glance. Next he handed her the heavy plastic bag. She took it with a huff and tromped out of the room. Her mother followed.

"Mom-"

"Mina, enough! Get undressed."

Mina pulled off her shorts and T.

"Underwear, too."

"Mom!"

"Honey, I've seen you naked before."

"But I'm an adult now!"

"But you're acting like a child. Come on."

Mina ripped off her panties and bra and threw them aside. Her mother pulled the Pink Lycra garment from the bag. It was dotted all over with the FeD Ex logo as was the pink diaper.

"That's gross."

"Mina."

The girl opened her legs and her mother slipped on the diaper, fastened at Mina's hips.

"What? No binky?"

Her mother chuckled.

"Well it's good to see you haven't totally lost your sense of humor. Here. Take the pill."

"Do I have to?"

"Do you want to be awake and bored for the next 24 hours?"

She held up the pill and a bottle of water. Mina took a sip and downed the pill.

"All of it. It's the only liquid you'll have 'til tomorrow."

Her mother held up the cat suit.

"No hands or feet?"

"Apparently not. Has a hood, too."

She squatted and helped Mina slide her feet into the legs until her feet fetched up against the sewn ends. She did likewise with Mina's hands in the sleeves. She paused to hug the girl, kiss her.

"Have fun. And remember. No drinking."

"Yeah. Love you."

"You too. Now duck your head."

Her mother tugged on the hood, tugged some more here and there, then ran the zipper.

"Okay. This is starting to creep me out."

"Don't worry. The pill should kick in soon."

"Yeah. I'm beginning to feel it."

Her mother took her arm and led Mina out of the bedroom.

***

"The airlines are even considering it."

"Really? Won't that cut into your business?"

"Not really. They set their schedules for the passengers convenience. We deal strictly in delivery."

"Considering what?"

He gestured at the bags.

"Cost savings. You could fly baggage for half the cost."

"I did, remember? For Grandma's funeral."

"But that was FeD Ex. He said that commercial airlines will be adding it as an option."

"I wouldn't mind. No hassles with luggage and security. Not to mention being jammed in with a seatmate chatterbox. It was dark and cozy, hanging there, rocking. Like being in a crib. Yeah. I would do it again."

"You remember?"

"Yeah. I didn't take the pill. It got boring at times, but mostly I just snoozed."

He stepped over to the girl and hugged her.

"Have fun, Sweetie. See you in a few weeks."

"Bye Daddy."

"Okay, Ms. Thompson. You ready."

"No."

The guy chuckled.

"Okay. Now lift your right leg. Good. Now the left. Squat down and grab your ankles."

The guy pulled the stretchy, nylon bag over her, cinched it.

"Okay. I'l going to roll you onto your bottom, pick you up and set you into the delivery sack. Okay?"

"Yeah."

"She sounds groggy."

"Yeah. The pill works pretty quickly."

"Here. Let me give you a hand."

"I've got it, sir. Once she's drugged she's officially in my care and I have to do all the handling. Insurance, you understand."

"Mm."

The guy picked Mina up and settled her into the large, padded, canvas bag. He cinched the top of the bag and hefted it up onto the dolly.

"What about air?"

"The logos? They're actually a mesh screen."

"Oh."

"Okay, Ms. Thompson, here we go."

Nothing.

"When she wakes up she'll be in Oregon. Your receipt has a tracking number. It's updated in real time via GPS. And if you have any questions you can chat on-line or call us toll-free."

The guy rolled the dolly down the walk. The parents followed. He pulled open the door. There were six sacks hanging from hooks in the padded compartment. He set Mina on the floor, hooked the sack to a winch and hoisted her to the ceiling.

"Busy, I see."

"Yes, sir, it gets busy about this time. College you know. It was worse at Christmas, which is why they spun off this operation."

"Sure."

The guy shook his hand.

"Thank you for choosing Female Delivery Expedited."

17.02.13